Date: 06/29/2023
Time: 3:48a CST
Entry: my friend recently reposted one of those artsy instagram posts that say one impactful thing. you know the ones. they say one powerful yet, seemingly simple statements that are supposed to make you think, or take a breath or something. this one said "your career is not your identity.". and like many of them it's been weighing on me. it's comforting to know i am not the only one that struggles with this specific phenomenon. it's becoming embarrassing to not know how to talk about myself outside of how i labor for others. a part of this, i think, is because i've convinced myself that i want to make my life my work. do i even know how to talk about myself, or feel proud of myself outside of what my profession is? i won't talk about my work here, though i am very passionate about it. what i do everyday for money is not exactly why i got into my line of work anyway, so it feels so out of body to describe myself in ways i am actively trying to shift in my life. always struggling between, "be this, who you are, right now, and don't fixate on what you want to be doing" and "is this even who i want to be". in this current epidemic of black and white thinking i am often rallying on team "THINGS CAN BE BOTH!". -to be continued...